Friday, June 23, 2017

Silence Is The Loudest Word

Communication, it's one of the singular most vital components of any relationship; whether it's with your family, friends, co-workers, or a significant other. The definition of Communication that I found on Google is as follows:

noun: communication
the imparting or exchanging of information or news.
"direct communication between the two countries will produce greater understanding"
synonyms: transmission, conveyance, divulgence, disclosure; More
a letter or message containing information or news.
plural noun: communications
synonyms: message, statement, announcement, report, dispatch, communiqué, letter, bulletin, correspondence
"an official communication"
the successful conveying or sharing of ideas and feelings.
"there was a lack of communication between Pamela and her parents"
social contact.
"she gave him some hope of her return, or at least of their future communication"
synonyms: contact, dealings, relations, connection, association, socializing, intercourse; More
means of connection between people or places, in particular.
the means of sending or receiving information, such as telephone lines or computers.
plural noun: communications
"satellite communications"
the means of traveling or of transporting goods, such as roads or railroads.
"a city providing excellent road and rail communications"
the field of study concerned with the transmission of information by various means.

Honestly I think this definition only begins to scratch the surface, but let's just start with what we've got. When I was a kid, my Father God rest his soul, had his own interpretation of communication. His version of communication involved him talking and you listening. There was never an exchange of thoughts, ideas, or feelings. It wasn't until I was an adult that we, through a series of trial and error, were able to start having real dialogue that amounted to something. And in what I didn't know were his last days amounted to so many beautiful and wonderful somethings.  But the point is that we we talked!

Recently I've been going through a situation that I'm sure other people have been through. As you may have guessed from my other articles, I'm currently single. I've been divorced for almost six years now. I dated one person for about a year and a half or so, but it didn't really work out. My kids told me that he was my rebound. About a year and a half ago, I found myself attracted to someone. Mind you I never make the first move, too afraid of rejection I guess, but I decided to try and strike up conversation anyway. We started having small conversation, sharing text messages etc, we've even been out a few times. 

I finally decided that no matter how great things had been going, he'd never said how he actually felt about me. Does he want to be just friends, does he want more, who knows, definitely not me. So upon the advice of a very dear friend, I decided to ask him. I sent him a text message, I know, I know, I probably should have called, but color me chicken. *laughing* Any way, his response was nothing...absolutely silence. 

It was in that moment that I realized that silence was the loudest response that he could have given to my question. There could be so many meanings behind the silence, but the person who sends the silence cares not to clarify, and it has to be OK. We need to understand that silence is a response, it's just not always the one that we want.

So press on, but remember this, silence may be the loudest word, but true communication is the strongest.

Much Love,