Wednesday, March 9, 2016

For Good - A Love Letter

I have no idea what has come over me the last few days, but it started with me listening to the song For Good, from the Broadway Musical Wicked. This song is one of the few in the world that can bring me to tears every single time, and for good reason.

For Good, was the song that my twin sons, my eldest children sang at their high school graduation. If I had the words to describe to you what it felt like to see my first babies stand there and sing so beautifully. I knew from my own life experiences that their lives were about to change and this was their love letter to all of us proud parents.

So the other day as I fired up my iTunes and put the song on a loop, with tears in my eyes I started thinking of so many people that have come and gone in my life. These same people have affected my life in one way or another. Some of my relationships with these people were brief, some are ongoing. Some of my experiences with them have been so very good, and some have produced incredibly painful times...but the beautiful part of it is that all of them have changed me for good.

With the recent passing of my Father from this life to glory, it's been thrown into sharp relief that tomorrow is promised to no one. With that being said, I wanted to share a letter, but not just any letter, a love letter to the people that God has used to grow me into who I am, and who I have yet to become. There are no names listed, but anyone who knows me and reads this, I hope you know where you fit in.

So this is it....

"Thank you! Thank you! From the very depths of my soul. It has truly been a long journey thus far, and I know that it isn't over, but I wanted to that you for being a part of it. You see, I have learned that every experience that we have shared, good, bad, or indifferent has helped me to grow into who I am. I am stronger now than I have ever been. That doesn't mean that there won't be days where I feel like I might crumble. It means that I know I won't crumble. I have learned to persevere. It has been tough but know I know what it means to "get up and rub some dirt on it".

"I've heard it said that people come into our lives for a reason, bringing something we must learn.  And we are led to those who help us most to grow if we let them, and we help them in return."

Thank you for laughing and crying with me, for being there for me when there was no one else. Thank you for all the Girl's Nights and Hen Parties! God only knows that they were needed. Thank you for allowing me to bring you into this world and watching you grow. Thank you for teaching me what a Proverbs 31 woman really should be. Thank you for all of my many "firsts". Thank you for teaching me that "What God has for me is for me." Thank you for leaving....because you see, if you hadn't left, I would never have learned to stand on my own two feet, strong, with my face to the Son. Thank you for teaching me that toilet paper is REALLY hard to get off something after it gets wet *wink* Thank you for trying to teach me how to drive

Thank you for helping me learn how to express myself in ways that at one time I would never have dreamed of. Thank you for giving me the courage to pursue my love of the written word. I don't know where it will lead, but I'm excited to find out. Thank you for teaching me to dance! Dance has become one of the most powerful avenues of healing and catharsis for me. Thank you for your trust and love. Thank you for our late night talks. Thank you for seeing potential in me when I didn't see it in myself. Thank you for teaching me that friendship is to be cherished and cared for

Finally, thank you for teaching me to love. I have come to realize that by me living through the absence of love, or through an imitation of what love should be, I learned to love myself first. To be able to look in the mirror and like what I see, physically, mentally, and spiritually. I'm still a work in progress, but when I look back from where I've come from, I can see how far I have traveled.

"It well may be that we will never meet again in this lifetime, so let me say before we part, so much of me is made of what I learned from you. You'll be with me like a hand print on my heart. And now whatever way our stories end I know you have re-written mine by being my friend."

I hope that we can continue this journey together because even if I never see you again, the experiences that we shared and the things that you taught me will be with me for the rest of my life; and whenever I pull them out and look at them I will learn something new. So thank you for changing me, For Good.

Much Love