Valentine's Day, the day when all around the world people are celebrating love in all it's forms. We are indoctrinated to the ways of this celebrated day of love with the same earnestness that we are taught about Thanksgiving, Christmas, and Easter. Primary school students harass their mothers to buy Valentine's Day cards (You know the little ones that you give out to EVERYONE in your class), mothers everywhere are sitting up making sure that they have counted their child's classmates several times over just to make sure they don't miss anyone.
Inevitably the time comes when you realize that for the first time there is that special someone in your class that you don't want to give the "regular" Valentine to. You want to give them that "special" Valentine, the one that says, "Will you be mine?" and you meant it! Or better yet, for them to give that special Valentine to you.
I'll never forget the first time that a really felt the hurt of not having someone on Valentine's Day. I was a freshman in college and I was living in an all girls dorm. I woke up that Valentine's Day morning and I'm headed off to the cafeteria for breakfast and I see all these bouquets of flowers, all kinds of flowers. I have no clue what made me thing that one of them would be for me, but I walked over and looked at each one hoping to see my name. Nothing, not even from my parents. Actually I don't think it was just about being not having a significant other, it about the absence of anyone. At the age of 18 I got a rude awakening by the brief glimpse of what alone could be.
Fast forward to current day......
It's Valentine's Day(Night), and the day is just about over and in the absence of a significant other, I am my own Valentine. I have come to the conclusion that as much as one may desire the connection to, a closeness with, and the love of another, sometimes all you have is you and you've got to be good with that.
Someday I might have someone else as my special Valentine, but tonight I have me, a nice glass of muscato, my chill music (Thank you Heather Headley) and my writing......and I'm good with that.
Happy Valentine's Day all, be blessed and love yourself.
Much Love,
Pandora
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