For Good - A Love Letter

I have no idea what has come over me the last few days, but it started with me listening to the song For Good, from the Broadway Musical Wicked. This song is one of the few in the world that can bring me to tears every single time, and for good reason.

For Good, was the song that my twin sons, my eldest children sang at their high school graduation. If I had the words to describe to you what it felt like to see my first babies stand there and sing so beautifully. I knew from my own life experiences that their lives were about to change and this was their love letter to all of us proud parents.

So the other day as I fired up my iTunes and put the song on a loop, with tears in my eyes I started thinking of so many people that have come and gone in my life. These same people have affected my life in one way or another. Some of my relationships with these people were brief, some are ongoing. Some of my experiences with them have been so very good, and some have produced incredibly painful times...but the beautiful part of it is that all of them have changed me for good.

Invisible Me

There's something about a crowded space, full of strangers that let's you know how invisible you really are. It might be the subway station, the market, a street festival; or most recently in my case a party. I'll tell you that I am not the most stand out of individuals in the first place. I am not one of the beautiful people that walk into a room and command attention. I'm a barely 5'4" middle aged African American woman, with a "goddess" body (that's the really nice way of saying full figured) 

I can't even begin to count the number of times that I'll be in a crowed place and people will walk right into me, like they cant even see me. And when I work up the courage to say, "Excuse me.", they'll look at me with that look that says, "Oh I didn't see you!"

I think in some way, shape, or form, I've been dealing with this off and on my entire life. When I was very little, I was incredibly shy. I was the kind of little girl that would hide behind my mother when someone would try and speak to me. And so it was until my first pivotal life moment, I wanted to be a cheerleader. I was in the 6th going into the 7th grade and the opportunity came around for try outs. I told my mother and she said, "Well, you can't be a cheerleader if your can't get out in front of people and make yourself heard." And so I did. I became a Junior Varsity Cheerleader, and then by my Sophomore or Junior year I was a Varsity Cheerleader. Cheer leading forced me to come out of my shell, but I was still unseen.

Butterflies In The Gutters

I have since then found out that the butterfly is called "Red-Spotted Purple" and it's in the Brush Footed Butterfly family. I found this information on the website Gardens With Wings. Click the photo go go to the web. page.

I live in Philadelphia and I work in Center City. Most days as I exit the underground train station I'm greeted by the smell of hot garbage and various forms of human waste that have been marinating in the heat through the night.

Don't get me wrong, there are some AMAZING things in the city, but after working down here for so many years, I find myself having to look harder and harder to see it.

I guess we can say the same thing about life. Let's just call a spade a spade, life can get down right hard, gritty, and dirty. You can pass hundreds of people each day, but do you really know what they're going through?

It was on one those stifling hot days in the city, where I happened to look down as something caught my eye. It was a stunning butterfly. I've seen small butterflies around from time to time, but never have I see one like this. The butterfly was flailing around on the ground in the street. It seemed like it couldn't take off so I "shooed" it to try and get it to fly out of the street, but it couldn't make it. The butterfly landed in the gutter.

Lying there in all of it's splendor, seemingly unable to move, the butterfly just sat there. I carefully walked over to it thinking it would fly away, but it didn't. I took a few photographs, but I had to think of something to do. I very slowly leaned down and just as it closed its wings, I picked her up and walked her over to a small flower box on the sidewalk.

I watched her for a few minutes as she fluttered around the box, but I had to keep moving on, satisfied that she just might be safe.

Our lives can be very much like this. We can find ourselves caught up in the muck and mire of the seemingly endless monotony of the daily grind, unable to see anything that truly inspires. But if we slow down  and allow even the smallest of somethings to catch our eye, we may just find beauty in the most unlikely of places.

Much Love~